In An Instant

Life changes in an instant. Jake had a bad time last night. He started having seizures, 17 gran mal in one evening and was out for the night. Father Brian from St. Johns came over and administered last rites. This morning Jake has started to wake but I expect will be out most of the day at least and I do not know if he will recover to where he was before the seizures or if he has taken another downward plunge. The MRI had revealed some new tumors which is indicative of this type of tumor. I had hoped to get him back to India to treat these but this appears to be getting to be less of a reality each day. It is hard to know the correct thing to do when you are doing it for the first time. Given my experience now, I would have gone to India first for 28 days to use Cytotron before things began to get out of control but it was simply too new and no one knew about it. It has been 4 months with no chemo and considering that he is just now showing significant signs I believe that at a minimum Cytotron stopped and slowed some growth. The problem is that the longer the delay in initial treatment the more these tumors like to spread. I still maintain that I would be on a plane tomorrow if I could and I am happy that at least 3 people have been helped because of hearing about Jake and Cytotron. The future is uncertain and does not look promising however I will still be waiting to hear from Dr. Kumar and his thoughts and continue to keep Jake alive and fighting as long as he wants. Father Brian said it best perhaps when he said it is really up to Jake and God at this point. I have told Jake the following for the last two years when he asked me if he would die:
"Everyone dies Jake. Some people will die today and they do not even know it. But today you are alive and that is what matters. If you spend your life worrying about each day then each day is wasted" As Dr. Sibia has told me, we are all just passing through to something else anyway we just dont know when. Although the end could come today, tomorrow or years from now, I would like all to know they are invited anytime to visit and talk to Jake. Today he is alive and that is what matters.