A Scare

Rollercoaster
Jake took a dive beginning Wednesday afternoon and throughout Thursday until Friday morning when he became awake and alert again. I was not sure if this was the end. It happened so fast. I had been reducing his steroids over the course of the last 2 weeks due to the side effects that bother him so much and had him off of them completely for about a week, relying soley upon the Hyperbaric Chamber which makes him feel so much better. He was doing just fine for an additional week on nothing. I guess he is not ready to be off of everything yet. With Dexamethasone, it seems that the side effects can almost be as bad as the good effects but I have to keep him on something until his edema is gone. We moved his MRI up from the 30th to this Sunday the 19th exactly one month from the last one to see how he is really doing. There are a lot of potential areas in his head that may need more direct treatment. Even with Cytotron you have to select primary targets. We initially targeted the largest tumor and the last 7 days the secondary tumor. There may be more work to be done in India for whatever may be remaining and we both want to go if he is travel worthy. We will know more probably by Monday or Tuesday after the MRI. Although Jake had a miserable time yesterday and I could visibly see the despair and tears in his eyes, still no complaining or signs of giving up. Barely able to stand without all my help and in a different world yesterday, he patted me on the back while I was holding him up as if to tell me "You are doing a good job" Last night and into the morning he lay in almost the exact same position for hours. Many times I was not sure if he was breathing. Then at about 3:30 am I heard a big sigh. I said "Jake you ok?" and he said "Yes, how are you?" He is alert and back in the game and I will be more careful about his meds. Sometimes you have to push the envelope to really know what is going on. I believe that is why he is still here. I will be trying another type of anti-edema drug tomorrow and see how he does. We will also continue the Hyperbaric Chamber which I cannot say enough good things about. Special mention goes out to Marcus "Felix Leiter" Allyn and Pam Vann for the hours of conversation yesterday or I should say my talking and their listening. Also my Mom who has come to visit and become the "Laundry Queen" again after a 30 year hiatus.
Apparently it is Christmas time in the world. It all seems to be going on but I have not really noticed it. Life and India has taught me and reinforced what matters. Kiss and hug your kids for me today whether they like it or not. Tell them you love them even if you never have. If you are a Dad who never quite felt good about it or embarrased because that is not how you were brought up, do it anyway. I taught my Dad to do it. I think he actually likes it. Today December 19th is the first annual "Tell Your Kids And Friends You Love Them Day" There is no question in Jakes mind how much we love him and no question in our other kids minds either. In a world that is out of our control, you have control over this. If you don't have kids tell someone you love how much you care. Sit them down and spend a moment, look them straight into their eyes and spend a few minutes letting them know. Do it for Dan. This is the only Christmas present I want this year and every year. I have officially created this special day.